WALKING IN YOUR WORTH: EMBRACING YOUR NATURAL BEAUTY WITHOUT COMPROMISE
We live in a world obsessed with appearance; many women feel trapped under the weight of impossible beauty standards. These ideals—often unattainable and dictated by media, influencers, and societal norms—push women toward dangerous solutions in pursuit of an elusive sense of worth. Whether it's lip fillers, breast augmentation, Brazilian butt lifts (BBL), or facelifts, the number of women turning to plastic surgery is on the rise. But underneath this growing trend lies a painful truth: these surgeries are often symptoms of low self-esteem and unresolved self-worth issues. When women feel they are not enough, they seek to transform themselves, believing that altering their appearance will fix deeper wounds.
The Dangerous Reality: Surgeries That Take Lives
“Surgery might change the body, but it will never change how you feel about yourself until you address the root cause of your insecurities.”
The cosmetic industry has flourished as more women opt for invasive surgeries, but the consequences can be life-threatening. Procedures like BBLs and liposuction, once seen as quick fixes to improve confidence, can have devastating effects. BBLs, for instance, carry one of the highest mortality rates of any cosmetic surgery, with patients at risk of developing fatal fat embolisms. Despite these dangers, women continue to go under the knife, driven by the belief that beauty—and by extension, worth—is something to be earned through physical transformation.
Take Rain’s story from Beauty in the Black. As she rose in the beauty industry, the pressure to conform to impossible beauty ideals mounted. Like many women, she felt her natural body wasn’t enough, leading her to make drastic decisions, including undergoing a BBL. However, this surgery didn't fill the void within her—it only masked the real issues she was facing: low self-worth and an internalized belief that she needed to change who she was to be valued.
The Cycle of Low Self-Worth
At the heart of this phenomenon is a lack of self-worth. From a young age, many women are conditioned to believe that their value is directly tied to their appearance. Social media, television, and advertisements constantly bombard us with images of "perfect" bodies, faces, and lives. These images often show women who seem to have it all: beauty, fame, wealth, and adoration. But what they don't show is the reality behind the scenes—many of these women struggle with self-esteem, insecurity, and the pressure to maintain a flawless image at any cost.
The cycle is vicious. When women don’t feel good about themselves, they believe altering their appearance will help them feel better. But after the surgery, they often realize the internal wounds—feelings of inadequacy, comparison, and unworthiness—remain. Instead of healing, they may undergo more procedures, chasing a perfection that doesn’t exist.
Impossible Beauty Standards: The Toll on Mental Health
These beauty standards not only take a physical toll on women but also wreak havoc on mental health. Many women experience increased anxiety, depression, and body dysmorphia as they try to meet these unrealistic ideals. According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, more than 17.7 million cosmetic procedures were performed in the United States in 2018 alone. These numbers are a stark reminder that far too many women feel like they need to alter their bodies to find love, happiness, confidence, and validation.
However, no surgery can fix the internal struggle. In Rain’s case, her quest for physical perfection only deepened her internal conflict. Instead of addressing her deep-rooted feelings of unworthiness, she turned to quick fixes—ones that ultimately didn’t heal the pain of not feeling good enough. In addition to that she’s currently hospitalized and undergoing an unnecessarily long road to recovery as a result of trying to meet these impossible beauty standards.
“True beauty isn’t something you chase or something you can begin to put a price tag on; it’s something you own when you walk in your worth.”
Beauty Shouldn't Be a Death Sentence
Perhaps one of the most tragic consequences of this obsession with physical appearance is how women are risking—and sometimes losing—their lives to meet these standards. The rise of in-home procedures and black-market surgeries further highlights how desperate some women are to alter their appearance. Women like Rain fall victim to unsafe practices, like botched BBLs or DIY enhancements with foam in a can, risking not just their health but their lives.
The question we must ask ourselves is: why are women willing to die for beauty?
Reclaiming Our Worth: Self-Worth Is an Inside Job
At the root of this issue is a critical message every woman must learn: true worth comes from within, not from physical perfection. Sometimes is not the woman herself, but it’s the voices of those around her, telling her how much her life will change for the better as a result of cosmetic surgeries. As a worthiness coach, I emphasize that we must embrace the truth that we are enough, just as we are. No amount of surgeries, enhancements, or procedures can fill the void of low self-esteem. It’s time to stop looking outward for validation and start looking inward for acceptance.
Every scar, every stretch mark, and every so-called imperfection tells a story. It is a testament to our journey and the battles we’ve overcome. Instead of hiding behind masks and false ideals, we should be embracing the unique beauty we each possess—one that transcends the physical and speaks to our inherent worth.
“When we are willing to risk our lives for beauty, we are saying our worth depends on what others see—not what we know to be true.”